Washington Post’s Petrow on Inviting Hostile Parents to Your LGBT Wedding


This week in his advice column for The Washington PostSteven Petrow took on questions regarding disapproving parents.

An anonymous reader wrote in to Petrow’s column inquiring if the reader’s parents should be invited to her same-sex wedding, even if they live across the country and do not approve.

Petrow recognizes the reader’s emotions writing, “Now you’re angry and hurt, and you’re considering axing them from the guest list. I’m wondering whether this is because you don’t really want them there, because you want to punish them for their bad behavior, or because you’d rather snub them than risk having them decline the invitation.”

Petrow posed the question on his Facebook page, where he received a variety of responses. Some respondents validated the reader’s emotion, while others pointed out that the wedding is an opportunity for the parents to grow and be included.

Petrow offers two other reasons to invite the hostile parents. He explains, “If you don’t (send an invite), you’re matching fire with fire, which is to say you’re being just as intolerant as they are. Second, if you take the low road, you’ll lose the significant moral ground you’re standing on and forever be remembered as the daughter ‘who didn’t invite her own parents to her wedding.’ Who would want that?”

Continue to read Petrow’s column, Civilities, on The Washington Post.